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1. Lessons of Peace

If you do not sit still, you will miss the lesson.

Written Friday, March 28, 2020 / Day 229 / Afternoon

As I enter yet another part of this journey, I am entering unfamiliar territory. Those who have been rescued from traumatic situations encounter a difficult period of time after their rescue.

The physical conditions have dramatically changed for the better due to the rescue. The ongoing pain of each day now replaced by the strange yet welcome atmosphere of stability.

Yet, to the rescued participant, there is a considerable amount of transition that is ahead. The physical conditions may have changed - but the emotional trauma, the daily struggle against the formidable powers of captivity still hold a latent grasp on the rescued soul.

Having been blessed to not have suffered physically in any way, the depths of the emotional trauma I experienced were bottomless.

In that emotional wilderness the ever present reality that the awfulness cannot really be shared to receive comfort. This was a constant frustration.

Wanting to relieve the suffering with some form of comfort - all that could be done was experience the empathy and compassion that others attempted to provide. Those efforts though - did not really pierce that emptiness. Not wanting to be viewed as broken (which we are) we put our best foot forward - all the time knowing that we are just pretending for the public. The public that observes, “Oh look at how well they are doing!”.

When all the time we are just gaging at the dichotomy of the emotional spectrum in which we must live. Putting on that happy public persona while our insides struggled to endure.

Now entering this time when the forces of darkness have essentially lost their full power (yet they do retain the ability to still bite a bit) - this new reality is very strange.

Having a visit from an old friend calm (Volume 7 - Essay #15 “Reunion”) was quite the surprise.

Just the appearance of calm was as much of a shock as calm can inflict - calm by its very nature is a settling thing. This week however, a new arrival has made an equally dramatic entrance in its own understated way.

Peace.

Peace arrived earlier this week. Its arrival has launched me on a very different trajectory. Peace and calm seem to work together. To me calm was the advance team preparing the way for peace to arrive.

This element of peace has compelled me frequently this week. Compelled me to stop what I was doing, sit down and then…..do nothing.

And there I am just sitting there. Marveling at the moment.

There is tranquility. There is an absence of strife. It is all around me. Its presence just as compelling as what has been replaced.

What is missing is that background, slowly simmering unsettledness of the life I have left behind.

And the moment is breathtaking in its simplicity.

That’s how peace is.

Now I sit in abject awe of how my world of just 27 days ago could be so replaced by this peace.

I go through the day with objectives and tasks to accomplish and then along the way I feel this overwhelming force that says, stop. Come over here. Sit. Reflect. See what I have brought you?

Yes, I say.

It is wonderful.

It is so welcome.

Now the tears are for a different reason. There have been so many on this journey. So many that have come from equally as many sources. Some from despair. Others from anguish. Still others from lost dreams.

Then the ones that came from changes in the journey. Those that came from God’s power when it touched the deepest regions of my soul with His love. Those that have come as the war with the future ended and a new way to go emerged.

Now come the most joyous tears.

They will line the road ahead as I learn how to navigate that road. As I learn the lessons that are to be learned.

Those tears of the future.

Those tears of joy that the lessons of peace have brought to the journey.

1. Lessons of Peace

Written Friday, March 28, 2020 / Day 229 / Afternoon

As I enter yet another part of this journey, I am entering unfamiliar territory. Those who have been rescued from traumatic situations encounter a difficult period of time after their rescue.

The physical conditions have dramatically changed for the better due to the rescue. The ongoing pain of each day now replaced by the strange yet welcome atmosphere of stability.

Yet, to the rescued participant, there is a considerable amount of transition that is ahead. The physical conditions may have changed - but the emotional trauma, the daily struggle against the formidable powers of captivity still hold a latent grasp on the rescued soul.

Having been blessed to not have suffered physically in any way, the depths of the emotional trauma I experienced were bottomless.

In that emotional wilderness the ever present reality that the awfulness cannot really be shared to receive comfort. This was a constant frustration.

When all the time we are just gaging at the dichotomy of the emotional spectrum in which we must live. Putting on that happy public persona while our insides struggled to endure.

Now entering this time when the forces of darkness have essentially lost their full power (yet they do retain the ability to still bite a bit) - this new reality is very strange.

Having a visit from an old friend calm (Volume 7 - Essay #15 “Reunion”) was quite the surprise.

Just the appearance of calm was as much of a shock as calm can inflict - calm by its very nature is a settling thing. This week however, a new arrival has made an equally dramatic entrance in its own understated way.

Peace.

Peace arrived earlier this week. Its arrival has launched me on a very different trajectory. Peace and calm seem to work together. To me calm was the advance team preparing the way for peace to arrive.

This element of peace has compelled me frequently this week. Compelled me to stop what I was doing, sit down and then…..do nothing.

And there I am just sitting there. Marveling at the moment.

There is tranquility. There is an absence of strife. It is all around me. Its presence just as compelling as what has been replaced.

What is missing is that background, slowly simmering unsettledness of the life I have left behind.

And the moment is breathtaking in its simplicity.

That’s how peace is.

Now I sit in abject awe of how my world of just 27 days ago could be so replaced by this peace.

I go through the day with objectives and tasks to accomplish and then along the way I feel this overwhelming force that says, stop. Come over here. Sit. Reflect. See what I have brought you?

Yes, I say.

It is wonderful.

It is so welcome.

Now the tears are for a different reason. There have been so many on this journey. So many that have come from equally as many sources. Some from despair. Others from anguish. Still others from lost dreams.

Then the ones that came from changes in the journey. Those that came from God’s power when it touched the deepest regions of my soul with His love. Those that have come as the war with the future ended and a new way to go emerged.

Now come the most joyous tears.

They will line the road ahead as I learn how to navigate that road. As I learn the lessons that are to be learned.

Those tears of the future.

Those tears of joy that the lessons of peace have brought to the journey.

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