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2. Equilibrium

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You never know when it will be disrupted.

Written Monday, September 16, 2019 / Day 35 / Evening


Today started out in an odd way. It seemed normal.


The answer to a prayer from the previous day.


Yet these days normal is just plain odd.


After weeks of emotional upheavals and crashes into deep despair, any semblance of normal is just very unexpected.


The day, as it turned out was also normal. I delivered two gifts. One to our next door neighbor for her birthday. I’d have to say it looked just like my wife would have put it together. The other was a package to her mother.


My wife would put together small gifts for her mother. Things to unwrap and thoughtful things she thought might be useful to her or give her a smile. There was even a card in her card warehouse already bought for her.


I packaged up a lot of items my wife kept on hand - being the regular gift-giver that she was. There was enough in the house already so I added two of her mom’s favorite gift cards, photos printed out of the great grand children and a few other treats. Had wrapped most of them - so off the package went for delivery by Thursday - for her 95th birthday on Friday.


Finished more laundry from the beach trip and made lunch…all very “normal” mind you.


There were only a few moments of sadness. Mild in comparison to the typhoon of emotions that blew through the previous day.


While looking at the weather I saw the most clever commercial - it just tickled me the way it was done - in 30 seconds it told a good little story in an unexpected way.


Then the moment came when I would say, hey would you look….


Opps. No one there to hear me.


A small moment. It didn’t bite all that much.


It was deeply strange…in a normal way.


I will head out to a group luncheon with former colleagues tomorrow. It will be nice to be with people. She was not a part of that so it may seem strangely normal.


Except some of the conversations may be about her - how I’m doing, we’ll see.


A “normal” day.


How do you like that? Well, a lot really.


We’ll see where this goes.

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