Introduction to Volume 6

This is Volume 6 of Essays on Grief.

I have learned that the limits of life are not really limits - but a spectrum of states - a range. There seems to be no end to the awfulness I have experienced. When it seems that a new threshold has been reached - it is not long before there is a new more intense encounter that surpasses what seemed to be the previous limit.

This is stunning to me and continues as these essays keep being a part of my life.

Likewise, and I already had an inkling of this - joy also has no threshold either. One day we will see that ultimate joy.

Reporting from behind enemy lines so to speak, my nature of expressing my thoughts in writing has been a mixture of therapy, tribute to my sweetie and occasional rantings about the absurdity of it all.

Yet this Volume 6 - far surpasses anything written previously. There have been many other writings during this journey that I found to be profound and moving at the deepest levels of my being. To be taken beyond those benchmarks dazzles me and leaves me breathless. Where can this go from here?

If there is a reactor-core of grief - we are certainly getting close to it. I have barely been able to write many of the essays in this Volume - yet I have been compelled to do the writing. Often, as is my habit, I re-read what has been written out loud.

For many of these essays ahead - I can barely read them out loud without an accompanying emotional breakdown.

So in the currency of the world of grief, I may be reaching some point where an exchange is taking place. The past may be yielding to the future - that nebulous future I neither desire nor embrace.

But the tectonic plates of grief are seemingly moving. Moving on to the future? Possibly. In my view of the moment - at least away from the past.

Essentially these may be the same thing. But for now my perspective dictates the latter view.

My praise continually goes to anyone who is reading this volume. It appears to be some new level of the most profound, touching and deep parts of the journey that I could have ever imagined.

I will never stop thanking you for your continued courage and strength in joining me on this journey.